Rab ne bana di jodi – Movie Review

rabneI hate to be the harbinger of bad news but someone has to do the job. The movie could have been the “coming of age” of love stories and it was steering that way in the initial 30 minutes but then somehow nosedived and went deep into the abyss of the cliched. Before going into the details, the basics first.

Rab ne bana di jodi is the story of Surinder Sahni ( played by Shahrukh Khan ) who works in Punjab Power in Amritsar. He is an introvert, down to Earth, simple and sincere man who does not know what love is because he has never known any “ladies”. He goes to attend the marriage of the daughter of his old teacher and ends up marrying her because of the death of the groom. His wife, Taani (played by Anushka Sharma ) is an extrovert, fun loving, ever-smiling-and-laughing girl who is his complete opposite. Taani accepts her faith and tries to be a good wife(although she tells Surinder that she will never love him), but soon gets bored of her monotonous life and enters dancing classes to participate in a dancing competition. Surinder, who is madly in love with Taani, wants to win her over and with the help of his close friend Bobby ( played by Vinay Pathak ), revamps himself into Raj ( I am sick of this name now ) and becomes Taani’s dance partner. What happens next is the (predictable) story.

The movie was great in the initial 30 minutes. Infact, it had that Aditya Chopra stamp and the Rate-o-meter was racing towards a 5/5, but then something went very wrong. Accepting the fact that this was a Bollywood movie and there are certain things which we are supposed to take with a pinch of salt but I think this rule does not apply to a man who gave us DDLJ.

I could never understand why Taani was not able to recognise her husband when he appears as the over the top, eccentric, gaudily dressed Jat who keeps on cracking inane jokes and keeps on doing that Main-hoon-na-hand-over-head jig. Won’t you be able to recognise a family member from his voice and eyes even if he does a complete makeover?

I could never understand how an introvert and inarticulate Surinder can turn into someone completely flashy and gregarious on the snap of  a finger. 

And I could never understand that how a girl who has just lost the man whom she loved and her father, can be in a mental state to think about marrying someone who is a complete stranger.

The problem with directors like Aditya Chopra and Suraj Barjatya is that they are not able to come out of the shadow of their trend setting blockbusters and keep serving old wine in new bottles. They are not able to realize that the audience has moved ahead and people yawn when they hear sentences like – “Ek ladki sirf yehi chahti hai ke koi usse bahut pyar kare”, when they see characters talking to themselves in long monologues with a voilin playing in the background, when they see the hero fighting a Sumo Wrestler for no apparent reason and when they bear a song thrown inbetween a sequence just because the director wants his 5-lucky-heroines to make a guest appearance. And if you hear – “Hum hain raahi pyar ke, phir milenge, chalte chalte” repeated n number of times in the movie, then just pretend that you never heard it. Don’t worry, its just Aditya “trying” to create the – “bade bade shehroon main aisi choti choti baatain hoti rehti hain” magic.

The movie drags in the second half and why not? There are only three main characters and the running length of the movie is over 2.30 hours. Shahrukh is very believable in the role of the simpleton Surinder and equally unbelievably inadequate in the role of Raj. The movie is worth watching only because of the adorable way in which he portrays the role of Surinder. Vinay Pathak is good in his role and seeing him in the same frame as Shahrukh is like watching Tom Cruise and Woody Allen together. Both of them belong to such different genre of movies. Anushka is very confident inspite of being a new comer and has the capacity to go places. The music of the movie is average and “Haule Haule” is the only song which would make you smile.

After watching movies like A Wednesday, Rang De Basanti and Taare Zameen pe, movies like Rab ne bana di jodi seem to be inadequate and below standards. “Mushy” and “Romantic” also has a new definition and it is called “Jab We Met”. Another good story gone down the drain. I hope it works somehow, just for Surinder. 

p.s. Don’t forget to watch the photo album of the honeymoon in Japan in the end. 

Rating – 2.5/5

Director – Aditya Chopra

Official Website – Rab ne bana di jodi

Tashan – Movie Review

When you start believing that life can’t get worst, it suddenly does.

This is what how an experience like Tashan can be summed up after watching movies like Race and U Me Aur Hum. Race at least had a constant oomph factor oozing out of each frame and an over-doze of twists and turns to make it watchable. Tashan looks like a mockery of the Indian audience, if nothing else. It made me believe that the Indian directors take me as a chimpanzee who will watch anything shown to him with great amazement and awe.

The movie revolves around four characters – Jimmy (Saif Ali Khan) who is a call centre executive and who learns to fire/dodge bullets as easily as someone learns to brush, Pooja (Kareena Kapoor) who works for Bhaiyyaji and who breaks into a sizzling hot number in a bikini just before submerging her father’s ashes in water, Bachchan Pandey (Akshay Kumar) who is a small time gangster and completely incapable of saying I love you to his lady love and finally Bhaiyyaji (Anil Kapoor) who is a notorious gangster hellbent on learning English and kills people with any sports equipment he can lay his hands on.

Tashan is an onion of problems. You can peel off layers and layers of them. Jimmy is so naive that he can’t make out that something is wrong when he sees a bag full of money fall off Pooja’s hands. Bhaiyyaji is one of the most irritating characters in the history of Indian Cinema and Anil Kapoor could have been nominated for the Indian Razzies, if they could have existed. Pooja is called a “bitch” so many times in the movie that Kareena’s grandchildren would be really embarrassed if they ever happen to watch the movie.

Tashan does not have a story. It seems like a rip off from Roop Ki Rani Choron Ka Raja, specially in the climax. And, oh yes, you would have to be really strong to bear the climax. Its the ultimate patience test ever created by Bollywood. The fight sequences are hilarious as you would have never seen heroes dodge so many bullets or jumping like a monkey on walls or ending up riding a water scooter in a gutter(kind of). Its unbelievable and sheer torture. Its amazing how our stars agree to do such scenes.

I would have rated the movie 1 out of five, but I would add another 0.5 for Kareena who is looking sizzling hot in all the scenes. Your heart would definitely skip a beat while watching her dance in “Chaliya” and “Dil Haara”. This 0.5 addition to the rating is also because of the comic scenes between Saif, Akshay and Kareena. Atleast they managed to make the audience laugh, even if it was ephemeral. And, yes, if you are going to watch the movie to see the latest hot pair of Bollywood in action, then forget it. Kareena is paired opposite Akshay and her love story with Saif ends in a blink in the first half.

An appeal to the director Vijay Krishna Acharya – Please come out of the mindset that Indian audience can’t digest a movie without over the top comic characters (like Anil’s) or fight sequences straight out of Marvel comic strips or without the thin waistline of the heroine on display. We are tired of giving the proof time and again, that we are ready for sensible and serious cinema.

One last word – After watching Tashan, I believe that Race should be sent for the Oscars.

Rating – 1.5/5

Director – Vijay Krishna Acharya

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