Daddy Diaries : The terrorist and the fountain of milk

Dear Diary,

Anika is not well. She has spluttered and splattered throughout the last two weeks. The clan typically went for home remedies which as usual did not help. Finally when the bouts of cough started bringing a crimson tinge to her face, the alarm bells went off and she was taken to a doctor. The poor girl is recovering now and always ends a cough marathon with a ‘Hai’, just like old people. The tribal dances are back with a vengeance.

A few days back Anika was drinking milk from a bottle while Geet and I were bitching about our neighbours. Suddenly, I sensed a cough taking shape from Anika’s throat and removed the bottle immediately. Well, the milk was still in her mouth when the cough finally made an appearance. There was this brilliant fountain of milk that sprouted from her mouth and drenched me and Geet. You could have seen the shock on our faces. We were talking a second ago and suddenly there was this spray of milk on our faces and the bed. It was like one of those days when it is raining heavily and you are trying to cross a road and then a car swoosh by, transferring the muddy water on you.

Now look what have I written! How can I compare a mixture of my child’s cud, saliva and sputum with muddy waters? Let me make amendments by saying that Geet and I enjoyed the spray. It was splendid.

Dear Diary,

During Ashtami, we dresses up Anika all in red and mom bought a red chunni and a lot of colourful bangles for her. Then all of us washed her feet and took blessings from her while she chewed the bangles to we-were-once-bangles shapes. It was hilarious. She was so perplexed and had no clue what was happening. Mom gave her a bit of halwa and she made a disgruntled face and threw it out of her mouth. While washing her feet, I asked her to give me a lot of money so that I could buy her tickets to Switzerland. I think she was excited by the wish.

Image from here

Image from here

Dear Diary,

Anika is getting very very active. Her hands and feet are constantly moving. Tell me this is normal? There is a four month old girl in our building and she is so quiet and never moves her limbs. And look at our child! I am disturbed because of Anika’s behaviour because she cannot understand that her pulling, biting and pounding might hurt someone. She tries to pull out my eyeballs, my lower lip, Geet’s hair, her teddy’s butt. This little terrorist is terrifying at times.

You won’t believe how many times she has kicked me in the balls. I have been telling her again and again that she is the only heir to the Sharma Empire and Geet and I will never ever have another baby but she does not believe me. She keeps up her efforts to crack my walnuts to make sure that there is no rival. I have never seen someone attacking her own source of existence with such vehemence.

Diary ji,

Diwali is almost here. It has been a year since I wrote the Sita and Draupadi Costa chatter series which everyone liked so much. Anika was a tiny, few centimeters thingy wobbling inside Geet’s tummy back then and we were preparing ourselves for the biggest change in our lives. Now she is here and sometimes this all feels like a dream. She is five months old now and can turn on her tummy. We have started giving her dal and soups. The moment she sees a spoon hovering over her, she opens her mouth eagerly.

A very Happy Diwali to you Dear Diary. I hope you grow fat and healthy.

And a very Happy Diwali to the readers of this blog. I and my family wish success and happiness for all of you.

Anika in her red dress and bangles and a tikka way off the mark

Anika in her red dress and bangles and a tikka way off the mark

65 comments on “Daddy Diaries : The terrorist and the fountain of milk

  1. Amit, so cute. Looks like you and Geet are fun parents to be around, now that you seem to be enjoying everything 🙂
    You write so well Amit… and Anika is such a doll.
    Happy deepavali to you and your family

    • Is there any other option? 😛 That is the least we can do to stop ourselves from going crazy.
      Happy Diwali to you and your family too Bhavana. 🙂

  2. Happy Diwali to you and your family Amit… 🙂 I’ve started missing my nephew after reading this, he’s 3 months old and throws up milk every time, is super active and constantly tries to turn around, he hasn’t succeeded yet. I guess they are all the same, happy, carefree, innocent. I miss him. 😦
    Happy first Diwali to your little angel. 🙂

    • Thanks Pseudomonaz. I think the turning around is still a month away for your nephew but once he starts, it will be fun to watch him roll from one end of the bed to another. 🙂
      Happy Diwali to you and your family too.

  3. That’s a lovely little terrorist. I am so happy to see you enjoying each and every move of hers. It’s indeed a treasure worth cherishing. A Very Happy Deepavali to all of you! 🙂

  4. Anika is so very cute! You call her terrorist now? Wait till her teeth comes and you will start thinking the kicks were better 🙂 Happy Diwali to you all !

  5. Happy Diwali to all of you Amit! Hope Anika is better now? She seems to be more interested in dal rice than milk or halwa eh? The part where you mentioned about her attack on her source of existance is superbly hilarious! 😀 Have a safe pollution free Diwali!

    • Happy Diwali to you too Sreetama.
      Yes, she is fine now. She has passed the cough and cold to the other members of the family, I being the latest victim. 🙂
      I am glad that you liked the part where I was attacked. 😛

  6. A very Happy Diwali to you too, Amit. Your Daddy diaries are always exhilarating and I always look forward to them. Thanks for sharing Anika’s picture. Shez beautiful. I need to start my own Masi Diaries.. my baby has already started dancing.. and she’s not even 1 yet..!! Imagine, today’s tots want to start dancing even before they can talk!!
    As for the girl in the apt – her parents’ worry. Yours is perfectly normal. 🙂

    • Thank you! I am glad that I am able to make everyone smile. 🙂
      Yes, you must. Most of the times I don’t even have to think what to write. There are so many things to write about. 🙂
      I guess she is normal. I know it will get worse when she starts crawling and walking. 🙂

  7. Happy Diwali to dear Anika, geet and you! She looks adorable in her finery. And in the near future, if there is a rival in her domain, I am entering you in the Christmas issue of Lancet!

      • Mine was spent consoling a shivering doggie, telling her she is safe; and, ironically, bolting upstairs to douse the fire the neighbour’s rogue rocket set on my curtain 😞 thankfully the shivering doggie did not realise what was going on!

  8. She is so adorable because we get to admire her lovely pics while you and Geet suffer all the tantrums ;-)! These children, I tell you! We have to be insane to give birth to them and then suffer their atrocities 😀 over and over again!

  9. She is so super duper cute…give a big hug and squeeze to her…and don’t you dare to call her a terrorist…we will all gang up on you when she grows up 🙂
    Happy Deewali Amit, to you and the whole family. Hope the baby is feeling better now.

    • Thanks Latha. Squeeze given. 🙂
      Happy Diwali to you and your family too! 🙂
      Yes, she is better now. She has transferred the cough and cold to us.

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