The Kiss of Freedom

This story begins when I was a bachelor. I had just landed in cold Manchester and almost lost my hand to the winters. Thankfully, I had a glove layered with a dead animal’s fur which saved me that day. I reached the row house where I was supposed to dwell and one of my very vivid memories of that first day is of a directionless drizzle of snow and one of my roommates asking me – “Have you ever kissed your wife in a public place?”

I reminded him that I wasn’t married. I thought he was missing his wife who left UK a few days back and these were his hormones that were talking.

“Oh you must! It is a great feeling!” he chirruped.

I rushed to the bathroom before my head could bang itself on the wall.

I had never before seen men and women entwine on roads and exchange the secretions from their salivary glands. I had never seen couples holding hands like two lost kids in a jungle. In India, the man is always walking two steps ahead of his meek wife. In UK, there was an opposite unabashed display of affection. Couples kissed at bus-stations before they departed to work, they kissed inside buses before they went their way, they kissed in the evening when they met on a bus-station, they kissed while shopping, while eating, while roaming, while watching a movie. The only place I was comfortable watching couples kiss was in a cinema hall. After all I had spent an entire movie figuring out the location of a guy’s head while watching a movie in India.

This world was overtly sugary for me. Why do they have to hold hands all the time? A month after landing in UK, I went to Scotland. One of my friends took his pregnant wife with him even after the doctor disapproved because he had already paid for the tickets. Then on top of it, both of them sat at the front seat and had a glorious view of the Highlands as we went in search of the Loch Ness monster. The wife got dizzy and smeared the front of the bus with her lunch. Amidst shocked looks, the tour operator scrubbed the mashed vegetable sandwich from the floor and politely asked the couple to exchange seats with a newly wed Spanish couple sitting 6 seats behind. As the Spanish couple settled in the front seat, their lips locked like two opposite poles of the magnet. I could see their lips from the gap between their seats and it was a very pleasant ride after that. I don’t remember much of the Highlands post the exchange of seats.

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A few months into it and I was now used to the sight. I even smiled at times. During Summer, as hundreds of variety of flowers bloomed all over Manchester and covered the city with a beautiful mesh, the sight of couples holding hands and smiling at each other made me seriously rethink my I-shall-die-a-virgin strategy.

That was the time I started talking to Geet.

After I got married, I remembered those words of wisdom told to me on my first day in Manchester. Now was the time to test the theory. I did not want Geet to slap me in public, so the timing had to be perfect. I took her to Paris on our honeymoon. My plan included Eiffel Tower – the hideous iron structure on top of which it was mandatory for the couples to kiss and vow for eternal love for each other.

“Wow! That is one ugly piece of iron,” Geet said the moment we landed at the tower. That was not a very romantic start.

As we ascended the haphazardly put structure in a lift filled with eager tourists (which included an Indian woman telling her 3 year old son that he was very fortunate to visit the tower at such a tender age), I wondered if this was the correct choice. As we reached the top, I realized that it was taller than what I had anticipated and one shove would have landed me in the tranquil Seine.

The top of the Tower greeted us with bellowing winds. It was as if a twister had hit it. People were holding their heads and running helter-skelter. We managed to walk to the other side where the winds were negligible. The scene was out of a poem. There were couples all around us, some of them dreamily looking into each other’s eyes, some of them kissing. I clasped the iron bar in case Geet decide to fling me over. I looked deep into her eyes and kissed her, thus taking to conclusion our first official kiss in a public place.

It tasted of freedom.

During our stay in Manchester, both of us turned into one of those insufferable couple who indulged in public display of affection, who could not walk without holding hands. She used to wait for me at the bus-station and we used to kiss as I got off the bus before we walked to Tesco. She used to walk with me till the main door of our apartment building and we kissed before she watched me walk away to work. We realized for the first time that expressing yourself in a public place wasn’t abnormal as we were always lead to believe. It wasn’t looked down upon. We weren’t looking around like criminals and making sure that no one was watching us before expressing ourselves. It was rejuvenating.

In India, you will be penetrated by a thousand eyes if you show a bit of an affection towards your partner in public places. It somehow attracts all sort of losers. You might be beaten up. We love creating noise over simple acts of affection. In the past couple of years things have changed. I see a lot more couples holding hands in malls and whispering sweet nothings in each other’s ears. It is a good change but of course, it is limited to the cities. A lot of us look down upon public display of affection as if it is a disease. But think about it. Don’t you feel instantly warm and affectionate when everyone around you is feeling the same? The very air you breathe changes. You feel good about the world.

The good times ended when we came back to India. Now Geet and I are confined to holding hands in public. I sometimes miss those days of carelessness, those days of fearless freedom, those days of magic, those days when there were no restrictions and I could kiss my wife on a busy road and no one gave a damn.

p.s. Try the Eiffel Tower at night. It is like Cinderella. The fairy godmother of electricity turns it into a beauty without equals.

[all the photographs are taken by me]

94 comments on “The Kiss of Freedom

  1. Lovely post Amit . I got all dreamy
    These days as and when I get a notification in mail box I open ur posts and start reading 🙂
    Seriously how much offense it is to be affectionate in public places in India and u don’t even feel like showing affection like there as there is no aura here ,. You need to be only between four walls for affection 😦 and the way u narrated is making me want to go there

    By the way u worked for tesco . Tesco was my client when I was with Infy . I worked in tesco Bangalore office for few months !
    Good u got a chance to go there I mean UK
    Hope u go again 🙂

  2. Thanks Afshan. 🙂
    I guess after you live outside India for a while, you begin to understand that there is no sense in confining affection. It doesn’t make sense, especially in a country that has the second largest population on Earth.
    No. I didn’t work for Tesco. 🙂 We used to shop for our stuff from there every week. Geet used to wait for me at the bus stop and then we used to walk to the store. 🙂

  3. Completely agree, I got used to it here too, isn’t it beautiful. Well, I’m glad I’m slowly opening up here and even had a peck in public. But yours and Geet’s on the Eiffel sounds amazing. 🙂

      • Yeah, the Eiffel Tower was our first one and we opened up after that. No one cares about all such things here. They are considered a natural part of life and that is the correct way. 🙂

  4. Just yesterday I was debating this topic with a friend. She gets all queasy when she sees PDA of people she knows – like friends, cousins, neighbours, etc. I tried to explain to her that whatever you have said in your post. She doesn’t think the world is a better place with people showing fondness. I also said that AB and I display affection unabashedly over here. I guess that is one of the reasons why our relationship blossomed and strengthened the way it has when we started living together – its quite simple if you think about it. The more affection you show, the more happy you are. Insecurities decrease making the bonding very smooth. The fact that your mind does not follow an algorithm before you get close to your partner and displaying affection becomes a part of your personality, and expressions become genuine, is reassuring to say the least.

    Alas, my friend did not buy my argument. She asked me to control myself the next time when we are around her. I explained that I don’t want to even if I can. We agreed to disagree.

    I had written about public displays of any kind of affection ages ago. Check it out if you want to –
    http://celestialrays.wordpress.com/2011/05/07/sights-and-perspectives/

    • Oh and Eiffel Tower with its lighting was mesmerising! And I finally know why it is romantic for most people- to witness beauty as a couple is one of the most romantic things. To be bowled over by it is such a fantastic feeling that the beauty kind of permeates into you and stays there for a long time!

      I cannot deny that I frowned when I saw it from a distance in day time. I thought all the money AB put in the tickets was a waste(the trip was my birthday gift. I jokingly say that I now own the tower as it was gifted to me) 😀

      • What your friend is talking about is a cultural block. Since she is brought up in an environment where PDA is looked down upon, she will continue to do so too. I too was not very much in favour of PDAs once but I changed my attitude. Somehow, objecting to a couple kissing each other seems silly now. 🙂 It’s no one’s business. I really don’t understand the hypocrisy with which we treat love in this country.

        Eiffel was really romantic at night. Millennium lights was one of the most breathtaking sights I have ever seen. It is not an impressive structure in daylight but yes, the view of Paris from the top is amazing.

  5. Well agree with you. When I got married even though it was not arranged in 2005, I was scared to hold Kiran’s hand while tying my show laces.
    Now that I live in Czech Republic, we almost have got used to displaying our affection towards each other in public very often. 🙂
    I have one Indian friend, one fine evening, me, my husband and she sat for dinner in an indian restaurant here.
    Kiran after sometime, because very romantic and started to say that ‘his life is nothing without me and all :-)’. Both me and my friend became embarrassed and she started to saying ‘eee golu molu to me(Punjabi Dehliete she is), I wish my husband does this to me and I want him to show his love to the world. But he says I have just got used to Czech people here and expect something which is not his culture’.
    I was not the least surprised at this remark. At that moment I felt but stopped myself saying ‘ask your husband if he will become less of an >Indian man< if he shows his love to his wife in public?'. Their's is love marriage by the way.

    • I guess most of the couples here in India are embarrassed by PDA because of the culture thing. Sex and any of its associates are to be confined within rooms. No wonder we are breeding like ants.
      PDA is not liked here not because of the act but because of the way it is treated by strangers on roads. If everyone stop bothering each other, people will be a lot more expressive.
      Things are changing for good though. I see a lot of couples with I-don’t-give-a-damn attitude nowadays.

  6. aah such a sweet post amit- i totally am for PDA’s ; nothing wrong in a little show of affection. But yes living in India it is looked down upon something criminal- sigh. My hubby has a theory about this- he says people don’t indulge becoz they fear of kaali nazar(evil eye); what black blue-duh ! But me n hubby do sneak in a little something on the roads (gee) OK where is the pic showing your kiss to freedom – for all this talk we would have loved a happy rush of emotions !

    • “Kaali nazar”? Haha! That is an Indian speaking. 😀
      I think things will change in a few years from now. They have already changed a lot. And that is good.
      Haha! You want to see a pic? Yeah, they are all password protected at the moment. 😛

  7. As much as I enjoy PDA in my stay abroad, I am not okay with kissing publicly in India. It is all to do with culture sensitivity. Hugging and holding hands publicly is fine even in Indian cities. And to do it in front of elders is plain cheap.

    • Yes, no one will dare to do that here because of the way people react. There is no harm in the act, it is the way people look at you as if you just ate a whole baby.
      Well, I do hold Geet’s hand and hug her at times when we go out with our parents, I think it is a great feeling to see your child in love. 🙂

    • I will not call it cheap. My friend’s mother has come here to help her with her pregnancy. My friend’s husband hugs, talks nicely and takes loving care of his wife in front of her mother. The happiness in that mother’s face is worth seeing! And I know for a fact that he does all that in front of his parents as well. Some parents feel happy about it and some feel it is cheap. But the act itself is not cheap…

    • Hai na? Ok to pee, Ok to spit, Ok to honk, Ok to bribe – basically Ok to do anything but no kissing. That is not our culture. The land of Kamasutra can’t stand PDA.

    • Lol!! Very good point! Wonder why there is no objection for doing your private thing on the road for those acts! Complete hypocrisy!
      Amit, Loved your story of the Eiffel tower romantic kiss! Very sweet indeed!

      • Yes, complete hypocrisy. I don’t want to belittle any culture here but our thought process has gone way beyond comprehension.
        Thanks for liking the post Roshni. 🙂

  8. It’s a culture thing and very strange. Agree with Rickie here.
    Couples are wary of kissing while saying goodbye even at airports and stations.
    A mushy dreamy post Amit.

    • It is strange because we live in a hypocritical society where people dictate culture for each other. When you start dictating love by cultural norms, there is something very wrong in your thinking process.

  9. I must have clicked on the image and was directly taken to it as if tht was a post in in self, that’s why the question.

    About the post, I loved it and could relate to it s much. For us it a actually like freedom because we are made to believe otherwise, when me and my husband went overseas soon after our marriage we kissed like two crazy lovers, nothing and no one could stop us. And same like you in India specialy here in Delhi our PDA is limited to holding hands and I am so afraid of some goons turning up from no where and beating us up or turn anything else into a news story. If I m visiting a local market or a remote area (basically any unsecured place), I make sure I look married and that was never the case earlier, Delhi scares me to a very different level.

    • Yes, I got that. 🙂
      Most of the Indian couples who go abroad taste real freedom there and understand that it is not necessary to keep love under covers. There are countries more conservative than India and we can could ourselves lucky that we are at least ‘allowed’ to hold hands here.

  10. One of the quirks of our strange culture, for sure, which just does not understand or tolerate the need for romance and PDA. It is an irony that people behave like Gandhiji’s monkeys in the face of street sexual harassment but think it their duty to stare disapprovingly at any PDA and do everything they can to make the couple uncomfortable.

    And hey, lovely photographs!!

    • Bang on! We avert our eyes when we should actually face it and save the victims. But of course, we can harass harmless couples. That is so much less trouble and more fun.
      Thanks Scribblehappy.

  11. people don’t have clarity on their culture so people perception vary across individuals.indian culture defines what has to be private and public to keep singles satisfactory and free from jealousy when they are not paired with someone,this keeps indians away from pda.indian culture says pda will destabilise human emotions and society.thats the reason we find errant and pervert sexual behavior and divorces in west.you know why west has billion dollar psychiatry molecules,they spoiled human relations and emotions in the name of free society and pda.

    after economic reforms and globalisation,india did import western culture from p.v .narasimha rao tenure.me and my gf go hand in hand in hyderabad and she gives me a cheek kiss in public before leaving to her home.am against pda in india,but girls in cities are adapting to western culture unlike me as i am from small town.

    • //indian culture says pda will destabilise human emotions and society
      Really? Can we be more destabilized that we already are? I thought we are already at the pinnacle.
      If you call the west ‘spoilt’, I think our society is equally ‘spoilt’. We too have rapists and molesters among us and in huge numbers. It seems our culture had not been able to provide enough clarity.

      • i was speaking about pure indian culture that existed before foreign invaders and people who inherited that culture.what we have today is polluted and distorted culture.our culture did provide enough clarity like i wrote above lines,but corrupt minds who inherited this polluted culture are unable to comprehend what has to be private and public.so everyone calls indian society is equally spoilt coz they never knew whats actual culture is.

        • I am not doing any culture basing here. Also, I don’t believe in the superiority of one culture over another. All cultures are creations of humans with some very obvious flaws. There is nothing like a pure and impure culture.

  12. Oh kiss at Eiffel Tower in the night ! Hmmm.. don’t make me dream something that’s never going to come true 😦
    We are in Dubai, where PDA would cost you a fine plus jail term plus deportation!
    Talk of PDA in India, my MIL was upset with my BIL and his wife for hugging and displaying affection in front of them – not public but family! She thought he lost respect to elders after being married ( and of course blames her DIL for this ), as he could not keep his hands off his wife in front of his parents. That too when he is the kind of person who always displayed affection, he publically hugs and smothers his parents and brothers addresses his mother as ‘my darling’ – my MIL has no objection to this.

    • Why can’t it come true? Dream on and it will happen. 🙂
      I know. Dubai is worse than India when it comes to controlling human emotions via a culture.
      And Indian MILs are a very interesting breed. They can be a case study for a lot of scientific experiments.

  13. The only chain that exists is in your mind- loved this post.
    I used to change channels when i saw even the smallest sign of affection. I remember skipping those pages of Sidney Sheldon & Pappilon (my first adult books)… I’m not sure this s becz of conditioning since my parents are super lovy-dovy. May be im a born unromantic 😀
    Not that I mind people making out and all. But I get this feeling that Im encroaching their privacy (even if they’re the ones who do it & care 2 hoots :D)Then Delhi University happened. Co-ed hostels, couples in the big bad gangs happened!
    My friends used to give me ‘lessons’.
    “N, its quite simple. 1…2…3…ummm”!

    • Thanks Nidaa. 🙂
      Haha! Yeah, lessons are important at times. I too got my lessons from some dirty gangs of mine.
      And then I read a lot of books and realized that culture has nothing to do with love.

  14. I get all squirmy and uncomfortable when I see PDA around here. We are going to Paris in June, I don’t know how I’ll survive 🙂 and no way am going to the top of Eiffel. I have the greatest fear of heights.

    • Really? I loved it. I felt really warm with so much love in the air.
      And you really should go at the top of Eiffel. The view of the city is breathtaking from there.

  15. A little bit of PDA is cute. Not slobbering over each other though. I’ve known friends of mine (a couple of whom both the boy and girl are friends) sit with us in a group…and then go kootchie-kooie with each other…and we would be like, um there are us around as well 🙄 get a room, folks!

    But yeah, that way the UK is a lot more free. You can show whatever PDA you want. Mostly.
    Indian cities are better off now. The occasional kiss shared between couples goes unnoticed as well. Like I said, as long as it doesn’t move to full time snogging in public.

    Reminds of the time we had to head to UAE for a short holiday… we were given this strict mandate not to indulge in any PDA whatsoever! We were like happy to get back to India at the end of it! 😛 Count your blessings!

    • Yes, Indian cities are getting better. A lot has changed in the last decade, which is good actually. 🙂
      UAE is giving me the creeps right now. I might drop any plans of going there in the near future.

  16. This was a pleasure to read. You write very well. The ‘patient wife worshipper’ bit in your header goes absolutely well with me. Specially after having read this post. Makes sense, if you know what I mean. 🙂
    Dagny

  17. Quite true! I didn’t know the extent of the taboo until I lived in UP. There, the woman may not even sit next to her husband on the same sofa in presence of others, let alone actual hand holding. And holding her hand even if she needed help in walking due to some problem would be severely frowned upon.
    Why public display of affection, public “communication” itself is taboo in many settings. In many UP households, the wife may not speak directly to her husband or other male elders, there is a roundabout way of communication, through relayed speech and through sounds, like making a sound with bangles on the bucket to signal to the male person that the warm water for bath is ready.

    • It is particularly bad in the North belt. I don’t know which program, but a woman was telling that his brother-in-law has never seen her face as if this was some sort of an achievement. It gets crazy as you move to small towns and villages.
      Thanks for liking the pics. You lived in Paris, right?

      • Yes, I lived in the Paris (southern suburbs) for a while before we moved to another country. I am more of a museum person, but I used up most of my free time and energy to show visiting friends the really hideous Eiffel tower. I don’t know if they all liked it at all! The only person who would have liked it would be my dad, who is fond of such megastructures. But every guest wants to see that instead of the amazing curiosities 🙂
        Your photos are really good shots, very nice composition.

  18. Totally agree with what you said. People make such an issue of it here in India. They look at you as though you are from another planet. Walking hand in hand, hand around the waist are such little pleasures that every couple must enjoy. These simple and small acts are what bring people closer.

    Me and hubby always walk hand in hand/hand around the waist wherever we go.I like having him close to me. But some people don’t even like holding hands. They think it would be a dent in their image if somebody saw them like that.

    I remember the first time I went to the USA to visit my sister and family and stayed back there for 2 months. When I came back, I spotted my husband waiting for me inside the airport and when I neared him, he just hugged and kissed (ahem..on my cheek). There were people of all ages around, but it was such a lovely feeling, knowing that you have been missed and your better half loves having you back. And it was more surprising it came from him, because he normally doesn’t show his emotions in public. I am the one threatening him saying “I will kiss you now, I will bite you now (on the cheek). I just love biting his cheek and chin and he always leads me to the pet dept in the grocery store and urges me to buy a doggie bone for myself!!!!

    Have to say, the pics are super!

  19. Let me start by blaming the parents yet again! We grew up believing that we were actually delivered by an angel and that our parents have never even touched each other. It was good that they didnt fight in front of us… but they even get pictures clicked standing in attention pose. Ok, atleast some of them do.
    Me and the Boy are all over each other when we are alone in a public place. Bring in some friends and we just hold hands. Bring in some family and we behave like strangers! And the fact that we hold hands after 4 years of marriage is quite peculiar to some and they call us ‘the romantic couple’!!
    Anyhooo… I think these small things keep that zing alive. In a way its good that we get thrilled with PDA. Something to keep looking forward to,right? 🙂

    • Haha! Yeah. I will make sure that I kiss my wife enough number of times in front of my kid to drive the point home. 🙂
      It amazes me how relatives go crazy when they see you holding hands. It is as if you have grown wings.

  20. I read this post on my mobile and loved it !! sorry couldn’t comment then ! My very first experience of PDA was at Heathrow when the couple in front of me in the line just couldn’t stop kissing 😛 I guess they were really happy to be back in the UK :p
    I don’t know if it is a Asian country thing because PDA is not so common in Japan as well. But nothing beats us Indians ! As Rickie rightly said, peeing, shitting and farting is fine but PDA is a no no !!
    Having said that I somehow find those couples entangled in each other in Lodhi Garden and Deer Park a bit much. I guess even in case of PDA there is a thin line between decency and gross !

    • No just Lodhi Gardens, if you visit the park in CP, you will find enough couples there entangled to each other. I think your society’s structure is to be blamed for that. Young men and women live with their parents and hence don’t have a spare room. Don’t get irritated by them. Pity them. 🙂

  21. Beautifully expressed. It is very natural in the west, one can just be ourselves, and be free and happy. But in India in those days in movies too they would show such clumsy kissing scenes, with the girl coyly walking away from the guy, as if he had committed some crime, really a very abnormal way of showing emotions.
    I think it is a fact in India, that people want it also and don’t want it also: very contradictory.
    The pictures are very good, and I enjoyed reading your blog.

    • We should be thankful that they have at least started showing kissing scenes in our movies. It is a good way of telling young people that it is all right. Nothing extraordinary about it. I was watching ‘Nautanki Saala’ yesterday and there is a very long kissing scene in it. There were kids all around and I felt good that parents were not covering their eyes or hiding them under the seat.
      Thanks Rama for liking the post and pictures. 🙂

  22. First time here.. Lovely space you have 🙂
    your post was full of nibbles we tend to ignore each day. How deep in our heart we want to get out of those shackles and do what our heart want, but something called society comes in between and we restrict ourselves..

    its really good that youth is gradually coming out of those shackles.. and may be one day instead of looking over one another we’ll do something we really feel like doing

    your musings are fun to read !!

    • Thanks Jyoti and welcome here. 🙂
      Yes, that is why freedom is so precious. You cling to it whenever you get the chance. 🙂 And it gives you power to break off the matrix.

  23. I approved of your licentious rendezvous atop the Eiffel Tower as much as I enjoyed your repulsion and leching of public smooching. However, performing the freedom kiss among the sex starved and sex crazed junta is an invitation to disaster.

    • Thanks for the approval Uma. Thankfully, the repulsion is completely gone as I have crossed over.
      And yes, your last piece of advice makes sense. Its a jungle out there.

  24. Enjoyed reading this post ! I wonder why some of us look down on PDA here in India.I don’t think there is any document in our culture that really “opposes” it (is there ?). Its just a mindset that’s been handed down from generation to generation !

  25. Acha, I was expecting a kissy picture of yours but didn’t find it? Did you forget to upload by any chance?

    Joy always,
    Susan

    P. S. In India only unmarried lovers turn all hot and kissy unlike the UK and US where every couple kiss and cuddle.

    • Haha! No you won’t find any pictures of mine on my blog except the green turtle. 🙂
      I am trying to change that p.s. about married couples.

  26. What a sweet post, Amit! Loved reading it.

    The Eiffel Tower does sound like a dream. I would love to visit it sometime in my life.

    Regarding PDA, yes, there is something immensely sweet and warm about people devoting all their attention to their loved one, in the middle of a busy street or mall, as if there is no one in the world around them. I am all for it. That said, there is a very thin line between sweet PDA and the type that makes you want to say ‘Why don’t you get a room?’.

    Yes, the situation has changed in India. Not sure about other cities, but I have indeed seen some heart-warming PDA in Ahmedabad and Bangalore. 🙂

    • Thanks TGND. 🙂
      It was ugly in the morning but very beautiful at night, so yeah, worth a visit. 🙂
      I think most of the people who indulge in PDA know about the think line. During my stay in UK, I never saw anyone cross the line except during Valentine’s Day when everyone is drunk and hardly have any idea about their actions.

  27. he he 🙂 I could not control my laughter 🙂 🙂 with how many butterflies you could have to take to that top and exchange love and suddenly a reply like wow, that rusted iron 🙂 🙂 it would be like a balloon lost its air 🙂 🙂

  28. smile is what I get when I read this post 🙂 🙂 the imagination of you hitting the wall was hilarious 😀 😀 😀 😀 I can understand how much you have gritted your teeth :D:D 😀 😀 at times, I like india too to be the same as foreign lands 🙂 🙂 pics are too good 🙂 🙂 will keep in mind of Eiffel view at night 🙂

  29. thats a nice and sweet post.. just to experience this i have been asking my hubby to take me alone with him when he travels.. some how things didnt click.. waiting for him to get another onsite offer, so i can too write about it.. may be now i would be conscious of Bunty watching us.. 😛

  30. Beautiful post Amit….!

    I guess PDA’s are fine as long as it is not over the top! We are probably not mature enough to appreciate any form of affection displayed by the couple in public! It is more to do with the our conditioning than anything else!

    • Thanks Metherebel. 🙂
      Conditioning and our fragile culture that will crumble by a kiss are responsible for a lot of insanity in this country.

  31. Thats a sweet post..firstly public hugs to both you and Geet 🙂

    I think its our cultural mind block, nothing else..honestly I find it really cute when people show geniune affection for each other..and whats wrong with that….as long as its not obscene…RD and I hold hands, and do hug each other in public..but I guess Bombay is a lot more relaxed than Delhi no?

  32. The land of kamasutra does not have place for display of affection.. but you know we can pee on the roads and molest also while standing in queues and buses 😐
    But really Amit, it must have been an awesome feeling – on the Eiffel tower 🙂

    • I think you can pretty much do everything that is against the law in full public view here.
      I loved Eiffel Tower more in the night. It was an awesome feeling standing beneath it in the evening as it glittered. That was an unforgettable moment.

  33. The Eiffel Tower is ugly yet it’s regarded as the cultural icon of France – home to some of the world’s greatest architecture. Ironic, isn’t it?

    Psst…we still do it. A kiss is a simple gesture of affection as long as its not French! Yet, we make such a big deal of it.

    • When it was constructed, it was considered the ugliest structure in the city. How time has changed the perception. It looks great in pictures but frankly speaking, it looks quite ugly in sunlight. 🙂

    • In India, we treat love as a sin. It has to be committed behind closed doors, even if it is just the act of holding hands. A lot of people think that holding hands gets a woman pregnant.

  34. Amit, only you can write such a sensitive post in a humorous way! A very sweet post. I completely agree with you. I remember a small incident. Those were the days when we newly got married and I was expecting. Hubby was about to leave to US in few days. He was at mom’s place and we were in a room near the computer with all my cousins…(younger than me..most of them around 18). I was self pampering myself and sat in his lap..it was all fine, until they left and my mom gave me a big lecture about it…ughhhh!!!! And hubby dear is always v.v.v. poor in PDA. Friends who take our pics have to yell at him, hold your wife man..put your hands on her shoulders ….:(

  35. beautiful post! Well forget PDA…the fact that i can merely walk and run at any place, any time without having to worry about dogs and weirdos harassing me …that’s my freedom!

    • Oh yes! A woman’s perspective is very different. Walking freely on roads without anyone trying to grope you – that must be something.

  36. off topic:
    did u notice this: even in other states, many of the rapists are from Delhi and surroundings.. is it their food? or their lack of culture?

    • I think they are everywhere. God knows how many crimes go unreported to give us a clear picture. But yes, NCR really takes the cake.

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